Hudson starts kindergarten this fall. Well no, not this fall. I don’t know why we say that. There’s still more than a month of summer left when they start school.
I’ve already had a couple of breakdowns about him starting. I’ve been a little sad about each milestone he’s reached. Each time I packed away baby clothes, toddler clothes, the high chair, I got weepy. But then we were off on a new adventure together, so I managed. But this time. This adventure. It’s his own. I mean, I’ll be there (Lord willing). I’ll be dropping him off. Picking him up. Homework-ing. Cheering him on. But I’ll be cheering from the sidelines. Because this is his. He has to do it. I can’t sit beside him at his desk the way I’ve done at home. I can’t make sure he turns his S the right way. Brush his hair to the side when it gets in his eyes. I can’t watch him play. I can’t help him choose his friends. I can’t remind him to use his manners. I won’t be able to sit with him at lunch and talk about our favorite things the way we’ve done almost every single day for 5 years. Our slow wake ups and morning snuggles will be traded for hurry ups and we’re gonna be lates. He will grow up a little more. Play a little less. Dress up will eventually stop being so much fun. And Mickey Mouse will be for babies. I know this is how it’s supposed to be. I know this is a part of growing up and these things would happen with or without school. It just seems like they would happen slower. And I know it’s just kindergarten. But ask any parent of a high school senior or college freshman and I’ll bet they’ll say it feels like they just registered their baby for kindergarten.
And I know we are blessed here with great schools and great teachers that I know will take care of our boy. I’m thankful that isn’t a concern for me. I’m thankful for a healthy child. The gravity of that blessing is not lost on me. But it’s going to be such a change for us both. I’m praying he loves it.
I can, if he does.